both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
I swear to god there was like a 2-second timespan in which he went from laughing to coughing, hiccuping, and subsequently projectile vomiting into the grass. There is literally a line in the grass, about 2 yards long, of his puke. It was more impressive than disgusting to be honest. And then he just shrugged and said "I have no idea where that came from."
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
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