He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
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