He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
Randomize
