So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
He was using OnStar to get directions to the bar. I'm pretty sure he'd have gotten her number too if I hadn't disconnected the call.
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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