the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
I just found puke in my bra..
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
Randomize
