Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
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Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
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I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
They left me at home... I'm a liability
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