I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
Randomize
