glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
Randomize
