I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
Randomize
