ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
The sky will open, cue choir of angels: "oh! wow! Matt was right! Not only will I grow out my bush, but I'm going to date straight, available men!"
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
Woke up to a note written on my hand that read "just because he kisses you, doesn't mean you have to sleep with him"
next time, write it on your vagina so its more effective.
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
Randomize
