You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
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