I just pynch a tree in the face
When he brought me into his room he showed me his James Bond calendar and matching sheets, and then told me that his goal in life is to be James Bond….epic fail. Mission Impossible. I was scared to take off his boxers to find out that they were also James Bond themed.
RUN LIKE YOUR JAMES BOND
She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Randomize
