i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's