someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
Randomize
