Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
I need to start journaling my drunk thoughts. Drunk me is fucking brilliant & sober me is missing out.
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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