So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Randomize
