I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
I hate it when the guy who runs the chicken and waffles truck is convinced that I run a cult.
that is the opposite of a normal text message.
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
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