I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
Randomize
