He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
My costume for the end of the world party was a success. Everyone in the ER thought I was there because I got hit by a car when it was actually from alcohol poisoning.
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
Randomize
