wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
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