You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
I woke up this morning covered in blood and peanut butter. I am now safe from vampires with nut allergies.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
Randomize
