Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
I remember reading the word "lift" so I did. The alarn went off, and I thought to myself "what dumbass pulls the fucking fire alarm?" and then I realized it was me...
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize
