We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
I'm sorry my penis didn't work
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
Randomize
