Having a random hookup so left but love u
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
Randomize
