Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
Randomize