She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
Please remind me tomorrow that I ate a loaf of jimmy johns bread on the toilet 5 mins ago
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
Randomize
