some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut