you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
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