rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
no dude he sent me cemetery flowers, i know it. they are half dried out roses in the shape of a cross, seriously. and he is not religious. so he robbed a freaking grave site for me. am i like an accessory to grave robbing now??
damnit this is what you get for dating guys with neck tattoos
Randomize
