so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
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the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
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