I just made out with a guy for $7.
don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
Randomize