Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
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