I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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