a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
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