I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
Randomize
