She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
Randomize
