absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
There is a huge fucking spider in my bathroom....I can just burn our apartment down right? What do you need me to grab?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
The sex would be better if it wasn’t interrupted because his home detention ankle monitor needed charging. At least I know he’s not cheating on me
Do you even hear yourself?
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