i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
Randomize
