I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
Had a dream last night that we survived the apocalypse. And we celebrated Christmas.
What did I get you?
A 12 gauge and a bottle of vodka that was waist high.
Sounds about right
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
I just found out through a drunken phone call that my parents thought I'd grow up to be a porn star. It's kind of scary how accurate they were at how skilled I'd be at sex.
Randomize
