Masturbating after my cheeseburger. It's unavoidable.
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
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