my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
"just because you look like a short version of scarlet johanson does not mean I would immediately fuck you" that was the single.most difficult thing to say. but seriously I don't want the roots of the whore tree anywhere near my junk.
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
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