so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
I FOUND THE LEGS
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
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