Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
One of your 'guests' left her bra in the kitchen.
Dude, does it look like any of the women I bring home wear bras?
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
Dear god my vagina.
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