Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
Just a heads up that Dad just brought home a new Porsche and the sales girl he bought it from.
Umm okay. What are they doing?
They’re in the hot tub
Can I get divorced when I grow up?
Randomize
