She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
You were face down in the punch bowl, humming the theme to jaws
That explains the stains on my shirt
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
Randomize
