Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
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