he's my edward cullen
I am pretty sure Edward Cullen never had an all-day drinking binge topped off with some blow.
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
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