whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
Randomize