she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
Randomize
