u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
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