I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
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I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
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I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
Randomize