Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
I'm having to shit out rocks
Randomize
